xoSelf (short for Love Yourself)) is a weekly advice series where women can anonymously seek advice on topics about relationships, motherhood, business, and life in between.
Dear xoSelf:
I don’t understand. I have a successful career. Look great. Awesome self-esteem. My own place, car, etc. In a nutshell, I have my shit together. But I cannot find a man for the life of me. I live in New York City, where there are plenty of single men – but they are either intimated by a successful woman or not ready to commit. Some of my friends say that my standards are too high, but shouldn’t I have standards to protect myself? Why am I still Single in 2023?
Answer:
Hey Lovely, unfortunately, you are not the only successful woman that feels this way. Once you’ve reached your career/business goals for yourself you find it hard to find a partner to share it with. First, I don’t think setting standards for what you want in your partner is a bad thing as long as they are within reason. You know what works for you and your lifestyle.
On so many occasions, we women, feel that we have to lower our standards to find a partner that works for us and it simply isn’t true. We just need to expand our search radius. Are you only looking in New York? Are you only looking for a specific ethnicity? I do believe in keeping your standards but compromising on where you are finding these standards. I’m sure you can find some great potential if you expand that search.
In the meantime, take up a hobby or join meetup groups to keep yourself busy while you wait on finding Mr. Right. He will show up when you’re not looking! 😃
Related article: Look up You’re Missing Mr. Right!