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We are so excited to partner with Dr. Walter Hidalgo with a goal of being more socially aware. Here, he answers your questions and shares advice on life and wellness while living in a social media-driven world.
DEAR THE VIRGO GIRL,
My children or my business? I don’t want to come to a point where I have to choose!
I’m torn between a rock and a hard place and I don’t see myself becoming unstuck anytime soon. I share joint custody with my children’s father, two of them living with him and two with me and we alternate for weekends, breaks, and holidays. We both live in NJ but I’m dying to move closer to the city where I can grow my business as a fashion stylist. We currently live in a small town, not even a popular part, and I really feel that being in the city will help my business flourish. He is supportive and agrees that I should but he won’t allow me to take my children. He tells me I should go there and just come visit on weekends or whenever. I don’t want to be one of those moms who leaves her kids behind for the flashing lights, and I don’t want to take him to court for full custody but I don’t know what to do. Please help!
Advice from Walter: Any person that is pursuing their dreams understands the level of sacrifice that has to be made. Those sacrifices become harder when you are responsible for the love and nourishment of your own children. Unfortunately, some people separate their dream and their children in the same way they separate their time with them and their partner.
Instead of looking at it that way why don’t you combine them–dream and children? Whether they are young or older, involve them in your dreams by inviting them to work events; teach them about the business; or, even have them help you with small things like sending out an email (or have you even considered doing fashion for children? That’s a big business/industry!). That is to say, find ways to be a mother and entrepreneur without disrupting the relationship with the father (communication with expectations!) and the role you have as a mother. Again, pursuing your dream requires work and so does raising children. So the same mentality you have in raising your children you need to incorporate into your dreams: late-night work sessions, learning as you go, relying on friends/family while you take those night courses, etc.
Enjoyed reading our #AskTheVirgoGirl series but feel like you need more one-on-one attention. Let’s chat! We have business and lifestyle coaching available to help you Organize Your Life and Launch Your Dreams. Pack a lunch and book our $20 for a 20-minute session.
